As an adult, I live my life by the clock. I like to be early, hate being late, and I care about schedules. My children do not. This is most apparent in the morning, when we need to stick to a strict timetable so that we get to school on time.
My ideal schedule goes a bit like this:
7:30am- wake up
7:45am- get dressed
8:00am- eat breakfast
8:20am- brush hair and teeth, and put on shoes and jackets
8:30am- leave for school
Simple, right?
My kids’ schedule goes a bit like this:
7:30am- whine about being woken up, then pull blanket back over head and try to go back to sleep
7:35am- yell at sibling for getting up faster
7:36am- finally open eyes
7:40am- lay in bed in a catatonic state
7:45am- get out of bed after being physically lifted off the pillow, refuse to get dressed, sit on floor in protest
7:46am- play with toys on floor
7:50am- ignore multiple requests from grownup to “please get off the floor and get dressed”
7:51am- start building lego tower
7:52am- get frustrated when tower falls over while still ignoring grownups
7:53am- start building new lego tower
7:56am- run to bathroom
8:00am- exit bathroom and announce hunger, ask why breakfast isn’t ready yet
8:01am- think about what to eat
8:03am- start twirling
8:04am- start singing while twirling
8:05am- decide on cereal
8:06am- insist on pouring said cereal and milk, while spilling each, and not worrying about cleanup
8:07am- eat a two bites
8:08am- talk bout the sad thing that happened at school yesterday
8:09am- eat one bite
8:10am- talk about the weird dream you had and ask if flying hippos are real
8:11am- complain about soggy cereal
8:12am- decide cereal is no longer edible
8:13am- get up from the table in protest of soggy cereal
8:14am- complain about hunger, then promptly forget
8:15am- refuse to get dressed, again
8:16am- wander around and start singing annoying, repetitive, popular-at-the-moment kids song
8:17am- continue singing while ignoring grownups (who now have picked clothes and are trying to force them on)
8:18am- complain and go to room to pick out different clothes
8:20 am- emerge from room dressed…no socks
8:21am- complain about having to brush teeth
8:22am- brush 5 teeth and call it done
8:23am- run away from grownup trying to brush hair
8:24am- grab brush and brush one side of head
8:25am- look for shoes and jacket
8:26am- can’t find shoes or jacket and try to solve problem by doing cartwheels
8:28am- stick arms out for grownup who has frantically found said jacket and shoes...under the couch
8:29am- complain about being too hot in jacket
8:30am- refuse to put backpack on and drag it around kitchen
8:31am- (grownup grabs backpack and gently shoves kid out the door)
8:31am- walk as slowly as possible toward car
8:33am- play with flowers around the car instead of getting in car seat
8:35am- complain about not being able to pick and take all of said flowers to school, while standing in front of car seat in the car
8:38am- finally sit and buckle up in car seat
8:39am- complain about feet being cold
8:40am- ask for a snack
…
sigh
...
My kids and I have a very different perception of time…
I know how to read a clock- they don’t.
I think it’s important to keep to a schedule- they couldn’t care less.
I like being prompt- they like to play.
We see the world very differently, and that’s ok, most of the time.
Now to go find their socks....